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Rule Breaker

The fashion world is full of do’s and don’ts. There are so many, in fact, a person may as well walk out the door naked for fear of committing a fashion felony. I hate them. How is it possible to confine fashion to simple rules? To these archaic ideas that certain bodies need to wear certain things?

Something I’ve always struggled with is the stereotype that plus size people don’t deserve to take up space in fashion. How is it that the largest people don’t deserve space? It’s not bad that we are larger, I promise. Our fashion brains work the same.

11 Honore is a company that is completely changing the conversation. For so long, I’ve stood at the designer windows hoping that I could lose enough weight that I could wear what they made. But, it turns out, that is not the answer. Changing my body is not the answer. Convincing designers that there is a market for Plus Size women is the answer. And that’s exactly what 11 Honore does.

This Preen set is all the “don’ts” critics say Plus Size women should avoid. It’s form fitting, it shows some skin, and it’s matching separates with small print. It would have been such a bummer to miss out on this set just because someone somewhere made up fashion guidelines. I think it is so special.

I don’t always love to show a ton of skin in order to feel sexy and this set allows me to flirt without compromising my comfort level. The top is influenced by the cold shoulder look, but with it’s own twist. By taking the cutout down from the shoulder and onto the chest, it’s a fantastic take on the peek-a-boo slit. The skirt is very form fitting, yet isn’t uncomfortable in the least. It has a ruching on a bias that is incredibly flattering on all body types and the print on the pair is delicate, floral that works for both fall and spring. I know I will be wearing this all season.

Photography Gina Fippin

Preen Floral Top and Skirt: 11 Honore | Brushed Metal Drop Earrings: The Curated NYC | Tri Colored Sandals: Pedro Garcia

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10 years down

I don’t remember exactly when I fell down the rabbit hole when it comes to David, but I do remember that when I did, it was a short and quick fall.

David and I met in March, were engaged by August, and were married the following September. We had no need to rush and we were still pretty young. Hell, he was my first real relationship at that point. However, every decision we made felt like the right one. It never felt rushed, even though looking back on it now, I would probably tell my 25 year old self (24 when we met) to slow it down and savor it. Savor the courtship and then really savor our time being married and alone. We have 2 wonderful kiddos, but if anything slingshots marriage into turbo speed, it’s kids.

And now here we are. 11.5 years in, 10 years married. And I’m sitting here wondering where it all went. How did all that time pass? And have we been good to it?

Our marriage is a pretty real one. We love and fight with vigor. The first few years were harder than I think either of us wanted. We were trying so hard to highlight the things that were different between us instead of celebrating them. And making the move from single to being held accountable to another person was difficult for me. We have had our fair shares of marriage therapists and even have one now that we see to make sure we are communicating fairly and kindly (Shout out to Dr. T!). To really round it all out, David and I work together. We have a photography business called ArrowMaker Media and we are lifestyle photographers. So, marriage+family+jobs. We are quite enmeshed.

And we freaking love it. And we wanted to celebrate it! There is a restaurant here in Sacramento called South. We visited it the first time together after a therapy session actually. IT IS SO GOOD. And lemme tell you, they are wonderful to work with. We hosted 50 of our closest family and friends for a night of good food and good drinks and it was perfect.

Since we were the guests of honor, we asked Chantel of Eleakis and Elder to photograph the evening. It is an amazing feeling to have wildly talented people of industry surround your own event. Chantel was warm and captured the evening exactly as we felt it.

One of my favorite parts were the calls and texts asking me what I was wearing. I told everyone it was casual and they would usually answer, “Yeah, but like Joan casual?” meaning that even in casual wear, I look a little fancier than the average bear.

I chose a simple, black dress and fantastic Stuart Weitzman pearl sandals. The earrings were fantastically strange, an impulse buy from H&M. The dress was shorter than I normally wear since my bootie can make short dresses basically inappropriate in the back, but this dress is a high low hem so it solved that problem easily. And I was comfortable all night. Even in the heels. I’m also sure all the rosé helped.

David, I love you. I’m ready for another 10. Maybe even 20.

 

Photography by Eleakis & Elder / Host Restaurant South

Black Swing Dress (Now on Sale!!): Boohoo / Pearl Embellished Heeled Sandals: Stuart Weitzman / Eye Heart Earrings: H&M (out of stock!) Similar shape here